Enticed by the grip that holds me inside
There’s something about the darkness that makes me feel alive
The way it feels flowing through me as I spiral down its slope
Traveling down the rabbit hole no longer needing hope
I do not want it to fade as my brown eyes turn to black
My stone cold heart slowly begins to crack
I am falling into the spiral of darkness and the lights start to fade
This time is different as I welcome the other half of myself no longer afraid
I embrace it for it is who I am, no longer fighting its tenacious grip on my soul
Maybe just maybe I will finally feel whole
Realizing nothing stops this part of me from coming back time and time again
It returns the feelings so familiar like a visit from an old friend
The pills they feed me are supposed to distort my insanity in hopes of making me sane
But they destroy the parts of me and cause me so much pain
Confusing me as I am always in a daze, they mask who I am as if I am not real
They take away the parts of me; the parts that can feel
Numbing who I am is this what is to be sane?
Wires crossed as they control my brain
Telling me how to feel and when to feel what
Can’t you see I have had enough
I am the mad hatter and this is my life, two halves of a whole
Darkness and light and lack of control
A spinning mess of madness and occasional rain
I do not want the pills or to be sane
I want to be free, to be who he intended for me to be
My unique DNA that made me become me
The ups the downs and everything else in between
Half hero half evil queen
What ever I want and who ever I want to be
I want to wake up and just be me